Paul instructs the Christians of Rome (and Corinth and Thessalonica) to "greet one another with a holy kiss."
It was family members, and those being treated as members of the family, who would greet one another with a kiss in Rome. For this reason kissing cannot be equated with shaking hands (contra J B Phillips) – a greeting we use with strangers and acquaintances, almost never with family members. Therefore, "holy" cannot mean chaste. Rather it reflects the identification of Christians as "the saint" (= "the holy ones," see 1:7). A "holy kiss" is the kiss of the saints, the family of God. Family is a key first-century value. It is your family that is your closest and strongest alliances in life and in business – the only ones you can truly trust.
Therefore, Paul's command is better translated as "greet one another as your closest companions." A command targeted against the divisions among the Christians of Rome (e.g., week/strong, Jew/Gentile, honoured/marginal).
Many of our churches today are too large for us to know one another. [Recently, one friendly parishioner asked if I was new to the church. "No," I replied. "I've been coming here since 1997."] This has led us to treat the sanctuary as "public space" which strangers inhabit according to the rules of politeness – don't sit too close if you don't have to – rather than as "private space" (e.g., homes) where everyone crowds in together. Next time you're in church, get there early and watch the sanctuary fill up; I think you will see lots of distance between people that is only filled in gradually – strangers sharing the same space rather than family gathering together.
We need to hear and obey Paul's instruction: greet one another with a holy kiss.
